EXCERPT Planet Simpson
How a Cartoon Masterpiece Documented
an Era and Defined a Generation

by Chris Turner

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Photo © Ashley Bristowe

D’oh! Canada

In Planet Simpson, journalist Chris Turner explains why this cartoon masterpiece means so much to so many of us, Canadians included. Here he gives us five of the best Simpsons references to the Great White North.





 

1. In “Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington,” Lisa is beaten in the national finals of Reading Digest’s patriotic essay contest by an adorable immigrant boy named Truong Van Dinh. The (apparently) full text of Truong’s winning essay, “USA A-OK,” is as follows: “When my family arrived in this country four months ago, we spoke no English and had no money in our pockets. Today, we own a nationwide chain of wheel-balancing centers. Where else but in America, or possibly Canada, could our family find such opportunity? That’s why, whenever I see the Stars and Stripes, I will always be reminded of that wonderful word: flag!”

2. In “You Only Move Twice,” the Simpsons move to a posh, high-tech enclave called Cypress Creek. Bart is put into a remedial class at his new school, where he’s “surrounded by arsonists and kids with mittens pinned to their jackets all year round.” Among these misfits is a boy named Gordy. Bart asks the kid why he’s in the remedial class. “I moved here from Canada, and they think I’m slow, eh?” says Gordy, in what might well be the broadest parody of a Canadian accent in the history of American pop culture.

3. In “Lisa Gets an ‘A’,” Lisa is uncharacteristically negligent in her schoolwork after becoming addicted to a video game, and winds up having to cheat on a test. Her perfect grade earns Springfield Elementary a government grant, but at the ceremony
at which the grant is bestowed, Lisa insists on announcing that she cheated. The assembled students start to boo Lisa for losing the school its grant, but State Comptroller Atkins (who later turns out to be Otto the bus driver in disguise) cuts them off and defends Lisa. “What she just did took courage,” says Atkins. “And where I come from — Canada — we reward courage.”

4. In “The Bart Wants What It Wants,” Bart embarks on a tumultuous romantic relationship with Greta, the daughter of action hero Rainier Wolfcastle. In the episode’s final act, Bart and the rest of the Simpsons travel to Toronto, where Wolfcastle is shooting a movie, and where, obviously, Canadian references abound.

5. In “The Bart of War,” Bart and Milhouse wind up in separate troops of two rival Boy Scout–like organizations, whose fierce competition comes to a head when Bart’s scouts botch a version of the American national anthem and incite a riot at a Springfield Isotopes baseball game. To staunch the flow of bad blood, Sideshow Mel makes a suggestion: “Let us end this mindless violence and join our hands in song.” Captain
McCallister — Springfield’s beloved crusty sea captain — immediately agrees. “Aye,” he says. “Not a hymn to war, like our national anthem, but a sweet, soothing hymn, like the national anthem of Canada.” The assembled throng promptly joins hands to form the shape of a maple leaf and sings a rousing rendition of “O Canada.”

Excerpted from Planet Simpson: How a Cartoon Masterpiece Documented an Era and Defined a Generation. Copyright © 2004 Chris Turner. Published by Random House Canada. Reproduced by arrangement with the Publisher. All rights reserved.

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